Child Abuse Survivors

Together lets put a stop to child abuse

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Anonymous asked: I was severely sexually abused from ages 7 to 10 by one abuser, & ages 9 to 13 by another. I now suffer from numerous mental illnesses as a result. I am now 37 & married to An understanding man. All my previous sexual relationships (as was all my adult life) were conducted whilst I was an alcoholic. I was able to stop drinking 5 years ago but since have been TERRIFIED of all intimacy & husband is losing patience. He now has virtual sex with women he's met on tumblr. & can't get counciling in UK

I’m sorry to hear what you went through and how it is affecting your marriage/relationship :(. It is very normal what you are feeling and it is of no surprise after what you have been through. Getting some help with this could be very helpful, here are some free telephone councelling services in the UK. I hope this helps you and i wish you all the best :) 

Take care <3

Rape Crisis (England and Wales) 

Freephone helpline 0808 802 9999  (12 - 2:20pm and 7 - 9:30pm)

http://www.rapecrisis.org.uk/index.php  

Rape Crisis Scotland

Freephone Helpline 08088 01 03 02  (6pm - midnight)

http://www.rapecrisisscotland.org.uk/

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luna-nix:

whoufflesoufflegirl:

the-treble:

willowpedia:

crazymolerat36:

ewitsmichelle:

not just followers, everyone.

same

I’m here if any of you need to talk<3

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The best part is, this post actually does something, it offers support, unlike one of those useless “reblog if you care” posts.

Exactly. Which is why I’ll reblog this one.

(Source: cali4niadreaming, via thesuggestivepopsicle)

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The NO MORE campaign launched last year, and was updated this week to include additional ads that are more inclusive to male victims of sexual assault.

“Being part of NO MORE from the beginning has been a great privilege,” Hargitay explained in a statement released on Friday. “Society continues to misplace shame and blame on survivors — both women and men. That has to end. By confronting the myths and excuses we rely on to avoid ending domestic violence and sexual assault, NO MORE fills me with confidence and renewed determination that we will put an end to the violence.”

Read More

(via death-a-n-d-drugs)

2 notes

Anonymous asked: Do you know if there is a way for me to get my hands on my Social Services case file or if I even have a legal right to do so? I don't know where or how to begin to get that information. call it morbid curiosity but I really want to know what I told them and why I was never removed from my home.

I believe their is a way to request to see a copy of documents they have.

Here is a link with some information which should help.

http://www.dss.gov.au/contact/freedom-of-information

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34 notes

Anonymous asked: Is it still abuse if your parents yell at you, damage your self-esteem, and sometimes even hit you, but say they still love you?

I would say yes. Even if they say that they love you it does NOT excuse their behaviour. Loving someone does not make it acceptable to emotionally and physically abuse them.

Here is some information on Physical and Emotional/Psychological abuse:

Physical abuse

Physical abuse is a non-accidental injury or pattern of injuries to a child or young person caused by a parent, caregiver or any other person. eg:

  • Scratching or biting
  • Pushing or shoving
  • Slapping
  • Kicking
  • Choking or strangling
  • Throwing things
  • Forced feeding or denial of food
  • Use of weapons
  • Physical restraint (such as pinning against a wall, floor, bed etc)
  • Reckless driving.
  • excessive discipline

Emotional/Psychological abuse

is when a child is denied love, approval and security. Bullying, yelling, put-downs, ignoring and being made to feel shame are all kinds of emotional abuse.

This can include a range of behaviours such as excessive criticism, withholding affection, exposure to domestic violence, intimidation or threatening behaviour. eg.

  • Verbal - yelling, insulting or swearing at someone
  • Rejection - pretending not to notice someone’s presence, conversation or value
  • Put downs - name calling, public embarrassment, calling someone stupid, blaming them for everything
  • Being afraid - causing someone to feel afraid, intimidated or threatened
  • Isolation - limiting freedom of movement, stopping someone from contacting other people (like friends or family)
  • Money - controlling someone’s money, withholding money, preventing someone from working, stealing or taking money
  • Bullying- purposely and repeatedly saying or doing hurtful things to someone.

Take care x

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3 notes

Anonymous asked: My dad has looks and touchs me. Saying its ok bc he is family. When I was 13 I can't remember why I got in trouble but my mom stabbed my side with her keys. I'm scared to go home everyday. I'm scared to do anything to make them mad. I'm scared to ask help bc what if this is just in my head? I realized that when I get a bad grade. I don't care that my grade has dropped or I might fail, I only care that it will piss my parents off and I'll get hit. I try so hard not to do bad things. (2/2)

It is NEVER ok for your dad to look and touch you in a sexual way. It doesn’t matter if he is family or not. NO ONE has the right to abuse you in any way. I’m sorry you’ve experienced abuse, it is something that no one should ever have to go through. Someone needs to know about this because it’s not ok that this has/is going on. Home is a place where you should be able to feel safe, not afraid of and every one has the right to feel safe. I know it’s scary but please tell someone about what’s going on, you could call a helpline, talk to a teacher (if you’re at school), tell a trusted adult or friend, a doctor, or a counselor.

This is not in your head, it might be hard to think of it all as real because the idea of that is too frightening but unfortunately it is real and you need to let someone know.

Here is someone information that you might find helpful:

Sexual Abuse

Sexual abuse is when someone involves a child or young person in a sexual activity by using their power over them or taking advantage of their trust. Often children are bribed or threatened physically and psychologically to make them participate in the activity.

it includes touching, looking, making a child watch pornography, taking photos of a in a sexual way, inserting fingers or objects into vagina/anus and rape etc.

http://au.reachout.com/What-is-sexual-assault

http://www.kidshelp.com.au/teens/get-info/hot-topics/sexual-abuse.php

stay safe and take care x

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1 note

Anonymous asked: Can you tell me if this is child abuse and which kind? My parents refuse to take me and my sister to get our braces, get her foot examined when it got suck in a escalator, take me to a therapist for my social anxiety. I got in trouble when I told on my brother for stabbing me with 3 pencils when I was 11. My mom has pulled our hair,slapped, punched our arms, hit us with things, cussed us out for having bad grades. She makes us feel ashamed of our body weight. (1/2)

From what you have just told me I would say yes that is child abuse and you should definitely tell someone about whats going on. Here is some information which you might find helpful. From what you’ve described these three come to mind:

Physical abuse

Physical abuse is a non-accidental injury or pattern of injuries to a child or young person caused by a parent, caregiver or any other person. eg:

  • Scratching or biting
  • Pushing or shoving
  • Slapping
  • Kicking
  • Choking or strangling
  • Throwing things
  • Forced feeding or denial of food
  • Use of weapons
  • Physical restraint (such as pinning against a wall, floor, bed etc)
  • Reckless driving.
  • excessive discipline

Emotional/Psychological abuse

is when a child is denied love, approval and security. Bullying, yelling, put-downs, ignoring and being made to feel shame are all kinds of emotional abuse.

This can include a range of behaviours such as excessive criticism, withholding affection, exposure to domestic violence, intimidation or threatening behaviour. eg.

  • Verbal - yelling, insulting or swearing at someone
  • Rejection - pretending not to notice someone’s presence, conversation or value
  • Put downs - name calling, public embarrassment, calling someone stupid, blaming them for everything
  • Being afraid - causing someone to feel afraid, intimidated or threatened
  • Isolation - limiting freedom of movement, stopping someone from contacting other people (like friends or family)
  • Money - controlling someone’s money, withholding money, preventing someone from working, stealing or taking money
  • Bullying- purposely and repeatedly saying or doing hurtful things to someone.

Neglect

Child neglect is the continued failure by a parent or caregiver to provide a child with the basic things needed for his or her proper growth and development, such as food, clothing, shelter, medical and dental care and adequate supervision.

I hope this helps, take care x

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2 notes

Anonymous asked: My dad hurt me (pulled me by my hair, kicked me, slapped me, ect.) I called the cops and they never did anything... What should I do? I need help.

I’m sorry to hear that your dad hurt you. What he did is definitely NOT ok, you DO NOT deserve to be treated like that by your father or by anyone. I’m proud of you for doing something about it and calling the police but I’m horrified that they did nothing about it. You shouldn’t have to feel afraid or hurt by someone. You should keep telling someone about it until you find someone who helps you, don’t let one bad experience stop you from finding someone who will help. You shouldn’t have to be in an unsafe environment. 

I hope you’re okay, take care of yourself x

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0 notes

Anonymous asked: Is it abusive when my my mom really really nosy, even if I'm still a minor? She always wants to know everything I do and say when I'm with friends and she always drills me after PRIVATE therapy to try to get me to tell her everything we talked about. She asks me other kinda weird things, like what I'm thinking about when we're driving in the car or something. If my answer doesn't satisfy her, she gets upset with me

I would say it’s more her being invasive which still isn’t very nice when she’s being that full on. I think it’s her way of showing her love and care for you, she wants to make sure that you are safe and okay even though she might not be going the best way about it. She might feel like she doesn’t understand whats going on and she desperately wants to so she can try and help you. 

Have you tried having a conversation with her about it and expressing how you feel about what she’s doing and how she’s making you feel because it sounds like she’s really stressing you out even though she might not be meaning to. 

To me she sounds like a very worried mum and is wanting confirmation about how you’re really doing or whats going on for you.

I hope this helps, good luck and take care x

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1 note

Anonymous asked: So I've cut a long time and I told my best friend that I'm abused by my parents and it was all fu*king hard for me. And now she started cutting, I felt like I'm runining her and she doesn't want to tell my why. I opened up for her and she doesn't trust me. It was so hard for me and...I don't really know. I guess it's because her parents and she are fighting often lately and she thinks that I'd feel betrayed when she cuts 'cause of such a "little" thing. I don't think I'll open up to anyone again

Hi there,

First of all I think it’s really brave of you to be able to tell your friend about what’s been going on for you, that’s a really hard thing to do and I’m proud of you for doing that. 

I’m sorry your friend has started cutting too now, that must be incredibly hard on you but you’re not ruining her. It’s a good thing that you’re able to trust her but it sounds like she’s having trouble doing the same because she feels like she’s letting you down, burdening you, adding to your stress or she might just be feeling like people will see her as a disappointment or failure. 

I think in this situation it might be best to keep re-assuring her that you care about her and that you will be there for her no matter what, that you won’t feel betrayed and that you know it’s not something that is an easy fix and that it will take time but you will stand by her through it. It might be good if you tell her that even if she thinks or sees her cutting over ‘little things’ that you don’t and that if it’s causing her to feel stressed then it is a big deal and it matters.

I hope this helps, take care of yourself and good luck x

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2 notes

Anonymous asked: Is it abuse if I'm just hit, threatened and yelled at? Basically, if it's just physical and verbal bcos I'm not entirely sure if it's just strict parenting but my friends families aren't like that.

from what you have told me i would say yes it is abuse. Here is some information on both physical abuse and emotional/psychological abuse. 

Physical abuse

Physical abuse is a non-accidental injury or pattern of injuries to a child or young person caused by a parent, caregiver or any other person. eg:

  • Scratching or biting
  • Pushing or shoving
  • Slapping
  • Kicking
  • Choking or strangling
  • Throwing things
  • Forced feeding or denial of food
  • Use of weapons
  • Physical restraint (such as pinning against a wall, floor, bed etc)
  • Reckless driving.
  • excessive discipline

Emotional/Psychological abuse

is when a child is denied love, approval and security. Bullying, yelling, put-downs, ignoring and being made to feel shame are all kinds of emotional abuse.

This can include a range of behaviours such as excessive criticism, withholding affection, exposure to domestic violence, intimidation or threatening behaviour. eg.

  • Verbal - yelling, insulting or swearing at someone
  • Rejection - pretending not to notice someone’s presence, conversation or value
  • Put downs - name calling, public embarrassment, calling someone stupid, blaming them for everything
  • Being afraid - causing someone to feel afraid, intimidated or threatened
  • Isolation - limiting freedom of movement, stopping someone from contacting other people (like friends or family)
  • Money - controlling someone’s money, withholding money, preventing someone from working, stealing or taking money
  • Bullying- purposely and repeatedly saying or doing hurtful things to someone.

Hope this helps and take care <3

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1 note

Anonymous asked: today, my brother attacked me, and started beating me up on the floor for no reason. I've had an abusive past so this scared me. My mom was mad at us for "fighting" and she whipped a hairbrush at my hand, causing the brush to break on contact with my hand. She also screams at me, and calls me names and says "fuck u and your ADHD" then she tells me it my fault and I deserve it. I wouldn't call my mom abusive, but she does have outbursts sometimes, not often. I just get scared bc my dad abused me

I’m sorry to hear :(, it was not your fault and you certainly did not deserve that. Your mum should not have thrown anything at you or called you names. It is totally understandable that it all scares you and its very normal to feel that way when you have been abused. Do you get on well with your mum most of the time? if so maybe you could talk to her about how it scares you and makes you feel when she does that. Everyone loses there temper from time to time but talking through it can help.

I hope all is well and take care <3

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6 notes

Anonymous asked: I was physically and verbally abused by my dad from when I was 3 till 15 (I'm 16 now) and now I have many trust issues (I don't really let ANYONE touch me unless I initiate the touch, and I get very nervous around men, and I have nightmares still from the stuff he did to me. But I am trying really hard to be less Nervous around men, and also not react if someone touches me without permission. Slowly but surely I know I will get better, and wish anyone else going through this the best of luck <3

It’s great to hear that things are getting better for you :). It is understandable that you don’t like people touching you and it will take time to be more comfortable with that. I wish you all the best

take care <3

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9 notes

Anonymous asked: I was six when it started in twelve when it ended (Im now 14). He came over at least once every week and he would always have some new 'game' for us to play. He finally 'did the deed' (as he likes to call it) when I was twelve. Now I still see him almost every day and I'm afraid to tell my mom and aunt. Whenever he sees me he'll smirk and hug me and tell me what a fine young lady I'm growing up to be. In a few weeks I'm supposed to be alone with him. What do I do? I'm so scared.

I’m sorry for what you have been through :(. You need to tell someone about this, it is not safe for you to be alone with him, i understand that you are scared to tell someone and you are so brave for telling me <3.

Is there anyone else you would feel more comfortable telling such as a friends parents or a teacher at school, another family member maybe? If not you could talk to the police or call a helpline and talk to them about it as they can help you.

If you find you really can’t tell someone then is there someone else you could stay with such as a friend of yours or at another family members?

Take care and i hope that you are safe.

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